AL over

so fast, one week plus de AL over le....... this whole week i think spend most of my time at cold storage ba... 59 hours last week. this week almost collapse from working... tmr starting work liao.. sian is the only word tt can describe my feeling right now. maybe because i have work too much liao.. play too much till no heart to go back to work ba... all the best to me ba. 3 afternoon shift starting tmr then 2 night shift... looking forward yet there is still fear for the night shift. i'll be junior in charge leh... one whole row somemore.... haiz...... wish me good luck ba..

next week is his bdayh le... will be celebrating for him..but somehow i feel that its one one.....
although here i am planing for his bday, yet, deep down i'm missiong someone else
why dun u reply my sms?
u are the one who start the story again after i had end it. since now u are the one who start it, u should be the one putting a fullstop. why r u avoiding it? i'm still waitning for ur reply and i'm ready to face the answer.. how much i wish u know how i feel. i believe u should already know, but why cant u just face it?

time really flies

i'm now 3 month old staff nurse le... and i'm enjoying my AL now. tmr will be back to work for 1 day because of that baldder scan course. anyway, today within ine day, i spend more then $300 buck. on specs, on food, on transport...
today i saw him again. never say much. realise that dun need to say anything. just looking at him from far is enough. knowing wat he doing. seeing him concentrating on his work is so cool.
somehow i still feel the disappointment. the feeling of being abandon. duno why. still have that little expectation. the way he look at me really show something different. i know it. he know it also. but... we still cant... we still cannot overcome that problem ba..

i wish i can see him again soon

i start to wonder

is it worth it for me to torture myself like that?
what do i really want for my life?
is it worth for me to wait for u so long?

i'm tire of waiting.
i'm tire of working.
i duno what i want.


why am i so foolish?
why am i so indecisive?


i hope i can be more firm
i hope i can be stronger
i hope i can be less stubborn

did i choose the wrong path?

why am i so weak?
why am i such a failure?
i feeling so down.....

anyway, thanks for being there...
u make me understand why i'm working so hard
u make me understand its worth for waiting for the past few months

few words

i'm tire,
i'm confuse
i'm lost..

i feel like giving up... really feel so tire le.................
why must there be changes in my life?
i hate changes

i'm confuse

what's happening to me? am i nuts? how can i do that? i duno... for all i know, after knowing something, i regretted... after u say something, i feel more upset... if i knew that from the start, maybe i'll be waiting for different thing now.. how much i hope that song continue and there is no ending.. how much i hope u will hold me till the end. although i know that i can't as if i really do so, i need something call courage. why must u tell me that making me feel so confuse now?
i'm dreaming. yes.... i can't... its impossible... i can't.. yes... last night maybe he just comforting me ba... maybe just joking with me also...
anyway, yesterday is a happy day for me la... super happy..... post shall be all about cold storage.. i got a complimentary from a customer. and i got a cert from that.. and heard that this complimentary make hougang famous.. something like that la.. because very long never get complimentary le. because so many complains.. singaporean ma... always more complains, seldom have complimentary de la.... in that previous part time job, i use only 3 months to get famous. but i regret spending my 3 years there...
although in cold storage, i spend 13 months before i get a compliment, but i know something that is very different.... i know there are true people... tomorrow will be another day in cold storage... after work, gg cs to work.. although tiring, but i'm happy... super super happy.... last night go k with them... cs ppl... so many ppl go. 01 boss, 03 steward, 05 rhonda, christina, jeff, mickey, susanti, janis, ivy phua, then got other la, steven, and the other 2... really play until very crazy.. haha....... really memorable.

i'm still running. i'm tire

the time now is 1am le. i'm still online. going to start packing. yet duno to start from where. duno to continue from where.
dun have to courage to move back home totally
dun have the energy to start all over again
dun have the hope to move back...

know that i'll fall
know that i'll cry
know that i'll hurt myself even more,
but i still need to move forward
the journey gonna to be tough
full of rocks and needles
but because of my aunt i need to carry on.

COLD STORAGE, i will sure miss u all de... we can compete for everything... even to see who write the most report.. and yea, u always win de lor.. i'm always the second... u should know who i referring to ba.... "HOW MUCH IS YOUR PICK UP AR? shit, how come mine so little... stress ar.... why no customer want to come my counter de.... arghhhh... "
one by one leaving,... what is the thing that is holding me back now? maybe hoping for miracles to happen ba... hoping u all will stay but knowing that all of u are tire and i cannot be so selfish,. but i really bu she de u all. i want those laughter again. i want the fun and craziness again... but i know life have to goes on. i know we should move forward look for better opportunity... just want to let the 2 of u know, thanks so much for the laughter u had brought. laught till cry is already so common thing that happen to me...

i feel so upside down now... be it cold storage life, be it family thingy, be it nursing, be it him... everything is like so fan... i really cant breathe now... i need some fresh air... i need some space... i running away from all the problem... yea... but how long can i run? how much further can i run?