some updates after MIA

realise that so long never update my blog le... so many things happen, so many changes... keeping to myself...
today i think should be able to release it all ba..

my life routine is still the same... work work work.. free time only out with 2 grp of friend... one is cat and the other is my cs clicks...
last thursday wen out with sec sch friend... once so close yet feel so far now... she is not is only one that i feel drifting away la.. but she is the one that i feel sad for drifting away... she accompany me when i just left my hse.. my lowest nights she is there.... now it seems like we are from 2 diff world.... her thinking, my thinking... haiz.... the gap is so big... within 3 years....

working life is tough esp when holding not only one job... the more i work in cs, the more i wanted to be back to normal life... holding only one job. but i know it is impossible.. whenever i step out of cs, i will think of when is my next working day... what is wrong with me? i duno... start to feel more and more irritated working in cs with those ppl. but... there is something that hold me tightly over there.... the more i work, there are more ppl i dislike. is it really my short temper problem getting worst?

working in hospital is even more worst.. morning shift stress over timing.. always scare that i'll be late... then afetr that stress over wok... endless work to complete... afternoon shift stress over what time i can finish my work... although i'm getting more use to this kind of life, but also realise life is so unpredictable. patient come and go... planned for home, or just waiting for time to come... those i still can accept... but abt those that come in very ill, then almost fully recover le, went for procedure, come back le suddenly left? till now, almost 3 weeks had past, but i still can't get over it. she is the one that i do admission, from very ill to fully alert, able to talk, when for operation. before i go off in the night still can say goodbye to me, next day i mc, then my off day,... went back to ward, recieve the news that she past away 2 hours after she say goodbye to me. how can it be... how can i accept this...
till now, i'm still very emotional to some of my patient... i still need some time to get over this....
then my luck recently so GOOD... patient fall purposely, patient handphone lost, patient complain abt me... omg... whats going on.....

think i had complain enough and release enough le.. time to go sleep le... tmr starting of the week, hopefully things will be better for me ba

tireee...

one week AL gone.... has being at cold storage 7 days out of 9 days AL cum off days and Rest day i spend full shift at cold storage.... so tire yet so fun. at the same time alot realise mummy really dote on me alot. even though its my fault, she will not scold me.... i'm feeling being spoiled in cold storage... with mummy, christina... and etc etc.... now they are really down with cashier... really wanted to help but then nursing side hour too difficult.. ytd and today night, next week night shift again... feel so tire le..time to sleep....

anyway, wish my cousin all the best (seems like he found someone he like de liao) wahahahah)...

a brand new year?

saying goodbye to 2009, thinking back, my best year so far since i move out ba:) travelled to 2 countries, celebrates my 21st.
now its 2010.... hoping that brand new year will be smooth ba.
anyway, heard that someone was caught having secondary employment in my ward. start to worry abt my job.. anyway, i more month to go before i get confirm... so shouldnt be a problem ba... hope everything will go smoothly....
feel so tire after 1 round of night but can u imagine, i'll be have 3 round of night within this 4 weeks? OMG... THREE ROUNDS... going to get killed by the workload.

buffet

ytd had another buffet at sakura with cs ppl.... happy... but, feeling lost.. crazy me... yup.. he really never appear... susanti also last min cannot make it... sad sad sad.

ytd E HOR again... phlebitis... arghh... first time in team one, i gana E HOR liao... irritated... busy like mad gal... that idiot consultant... FOLLOW ROUND FOLLOW ROUND FOLLOW ROUND... crazy sia.. nurses so free to follow rounds meh. then who is going to do the changes... still have trendcare need to predict... as if we very free like that.. hope he will leave my ward asap... everyone will clap for his leaving de........

haiz... need to go work again.. dragging as usual... irritated... arghhhhhhhhh

别再为他流泪

你走了太久一定很累
他错了不该你来面对
离开他就好 就算了 心情很干脆

他其实没有那么绝对
远一点你就看出真伪
离开他不等于你的世界会崩溃
转个弯你还能飞

就别再为他流泪
别再让他操控你的伤悲
就算有一点愚昧一点点后悔
也不要太狼狈
他不值得你的泪
把那遗憾留在大雨的街
你曾在迷失的旅途中盲目追
以后为自己醉
以后管他是谁
每段感情都非常珍贵
他的好你就放在心扉
记得有个人曾让你那样的心醉

你笑了照亮夜幕的黑
什么梦都不比你的美
多少年以后想起他还有些体会
那些你已无所谓

梁靜茹 對不起我愛你

沒別的　只想說對不起　對不起　我真的愛你
不管你會怎麼想　你怎麼說　也不會改變我的決定

你知道　有時候感情事很難說　很難說　愛人或朋友
從前到現在我真的感覺要　一想你　我的心就發燒

想給你聽我的心跳　想你知道我睡的不好
喝水想著你　搭車想著你　闔眼閉眼間　出現的全是你
我猜不到你的表情　我等不到你的回應
不想難為你　又不想放棄你　決定告訴你
對不起對不起　我愛你

沒別的　只想說對不起　怎麼樣　我都會珍惜
不管你會怎麼講　你怎麼做　也不會影響我的心情

你知道　有時候男孩更難捉摸　難捉摸　愛人或朋友
現在到永遠我真會感覺要　一想你　我的心就狂跳

我的模樣記不記得牢　情人卡有沒有收到
讀書想著你　聽歌想著你　大地和藍天　出現的全是你
我才不管你的表情　我才不理你回不回應
不想難為你　又不想放棄你　決定告訴你
對不起對不起　我愛你

你聽一聽我的心跳　你看一看我睡的不好
喝水想著你　搭車想見你　闔眼閉眼間　出現的全是你
我猜不著你的表情　我等不到你的回應
不想難為你　又不想放棄你　決定告訴你
對不起對不起　我愛你

he is not going

how stupid am i having a high hope that he will go for this thursday outing.....
haiz.... yup.... he fly kite us.... ask my good friend to ask me to organize one buffet... i should say nowadays really no energy to organise one meet up... have to confirm one by one... have to wait for reply... getting disappointment...
this time round, i decide to plan another one, because of him and one of my friend... end up, i get disappointment again...
i should have expected this... but why am i still feeling sad leh?
arghhhhhh.... poly friends asking me to organize also... that one even harder sia... working shift work somemore.... harder to plan...
work at cold storage had not being very smooth... starting from that stupid old bitch de complain letter..... then every week there is something happening... then i lost my dinner and dance de ticket, getting feedback from 01 saying my voice too loud while serving customer, changing counter 3 time early morning because counter spoil. today even better sia... broke one of the counter locker key. the key struck inside. lucky later part of the day i manage to pull it out... then reach home liao gana a news that i overcharge a customer by $4plus... and that customer is very irritating type de lo... haizzzzz....
i will be dragging myself work again... and i can foresee that what is happening in yoshi is going to happen in cold storage... the same story, but in a slower process..... how can i stop it from happening????? how i can change back to the last time de me? arghhhhh